“As long as you have life and breath, believe. Believe for those who cannot. Believe even if you have stopped believing. Believe for the sake of the dead, for love, to keep your heart beating, believe. Never give up, never despair, let no mystery confound you into the conclusion that mystery cannot be yours.” ― Mark Helprin, A Soldier of the Great War.
BELIEF. A magical thing one possesses.
Millions of us walking on the street, with a billion different thoughts jittering up in our heads, a thousand different hearts pounding, yet we all believe. Consciously or sub-consciously, we all are habitual of keeping faith in something. How else would superstitions exist? Happy endings, light at the end of the tunnel, hard work paying off, natural healing, time healing up all wounds, or God himself. The list has a countless number of things! Yet there's one thing we all, in particular, have been taught to never eradicate from our mind, heart and soul. The one thing that has given rise to the Satan, parallely. GOD. So, a very common question: Does he exist? If yes, then why do we always only refer to him as 'he' or the 'almighty'? These are questions that buzz around one's head so very often that eventually we learn to ignore it, talking ourselves into believing that there exist no answers. We blind ourselves to the one very important question which can help us walk on the path of becoming a better person from the current path we're on, where all we do is sniff like a dog and move towards it, simply adhering to what we have been obliged to do. So I wanted answers, not to pen them down or anything but to clear that part of my head which was occupied by this dubiousness. I wouldn't say I went to an isolated room, dressed up like a comical scientist and sat there for days mulling over my thoughts, trying to dig up answers for my peace of mind. It was there, of course, but at the back of my mind, trailing around, WAITING.
Well, I don't know how it happened. Ask anybody who EVER discovered anything, he'll never be able to inform you about exactly how and when it struck him. Similarly, IT JUST HAPPENED. Everyone could have different explanations, but as long as they help them suffice all those explanations are right! Because of the sudden strike of lightening that hit my head I think a lot of my doubts and confusion about believing in God and not believing have pretty much been settled up there. So here's the thing.
I really don't think God exists. Don't get judgmental here, I'm clearly not an atheist. I just think God is something we cling to.
In the words of John Buchan, "An atheist is a man who has no invisible means of support." God is like an invisible support to man. All those idols of Krishna and Ram, well they are still scientifically trying to prove their existence, right? They could have been real, God could have been a person but to me he is not. Although, (I know this will sound really contradicting) when I think of God I always picture Lord Krishna yet I think God is more of a feeling. You know, like something to push you back up when you trip and fall. Something to give us answers for when we're out of them. Humans are flawed, not perfect. We won't always have the answers now, will we? Hence, in situations like these when we don't know what to expect we turn to him.
Because being clueless feels a tiny bit better when you know that someone up there knows what you don't.